Did you know rejection is protection?
Often, when you feel like you’ve failed, you actually reject yourself, which was more of what I was used to in my own life. “I’m not good because I didn’t do well.” “If I just do a little better, I am better.” Even if this isn’t spoken, it lives in your unconscious, waiting to judge you harshly if you encounter a failure.
When things go awry, it’s not about your weakness
This tripwire of self loathing is based on the belief that you are to blame for whatever doesn’t go well. Maybe your parents said these literal words or maybe their actions or judgement influenced you to infer this core belief. When you do feel you are to blame, you abandon yourself. Shame, punishment and need for redemption becomes the show stealer, instead of just a straightforward experience of disappointment and life lessons.